5 YEARS

Adam,

This post is a few weeks late.  A month late to be exact.  This is one of my favorite posts to write every year because I love to look back at them and remember just how I felt at that point during our marriage. 

So the funny thing about this year and this being late is it's because I disliked you more than I liked you last month.  I didn't want to write you a letter that wasn't real.  I love you more than anything in this world but no one drives me as crazy as you do kid.  I laugh even typing that because truly disliking is not something I could ever imagine happening but every person that's been married or in a long relationship can relate.  Not every day is perfect.  In the mess of preparing for a new baby, trying to keep this house in one piece, working my butt off everyday to make sure Aidan is an amazing young boy and hardly getting to see you because of your work schedule this time of year, we've done our fair share of disconnecting. 

BUT as lack luster as our life can sometimes seem and as disconnected as I may feel due to pregnancy hormones I look forward to our anniversary every year.  Every year I love knowing we are making it.  Our start was so nuts and the odds were surely against us.  I want you to know I never expected it all to be perfect.  Real love, it's not like the movies.  Our love...it's in the 25 phone calls we make to each other a day. It's in selecting a paint color for the nursery.  In the smile we share across the car when Aidan makes a totally inappropriate comment from the back seat.  It's also in the disagreements and the stress I am so well known for creating around here.  There's even some love in your clothes that you leave all over the house although I've asked you to pick them up a hundred times.  HA!

I didn't worry about making big plans this year for number 5.  I didn't worry because I know there is no shortage of anniversaries in our future.  There will be plenty of years to travel and sit on a beach by ourselves.  This year was for us as a family.  We did something with Aidan to remember before becoming a family of four.  It wasn't glamorous but it was a celebration of lots of things none the less.

Even on the days you drive me absolutely bat shit crazy, I'm just so, so thankful it's you.  To a lot of people it doesn't look like much, but for me, our marriage, it's my fairytale.

Love you more everyday,
A