Playing Catch Up

If I had a dollar for every time I've apologized for neglecting this blog...I would literally be a few dollars richer than I am now. I apologize here, I tell people in person when they ask me why I'm not keeping up and I say it to myself over and over in my head.  

The truth is, I made a New Years resolution this year.  I never do that.  But I needed some time away from my computer and phone.  My kids and my husband needed more face time.  And they deserve it.  So I've been taking a break.  It's been good.  I'm nervous I'm not documenting our time enough here but the real time memories we are making have been some of the very best.

But I want to catch up.  

So try not to be bored to tears when you are reading posts from life events that happened months ago.  

I've got to start somewhere.  

Xo

Halloween 2013

I'm literally laughing that I am so far behind on blogging that I'm posting about Halloween!  It's January! 

I have been dying for the day I could dress Aidan and Kellan up as a "tag team" for Halloween.  Adam and I went back and forth for weeks on what we would dress them as.  Full disclosure: I was way more in to this project than Adam.  He said "yes" to everything!

Maverick and Goose

Batman and Robin

The old man and the boy scout from the Movie "Up"

Fish and Chips

We (I) decided on a pirate and his parrot. 

I knew I wanted to make their costumes.  That's my new thing.  Making my children's costumes.  I was so pumped about it.  I was thinking about it day and night.  Ha!

I bought a rainbow boa and hot glued it to a bright blue long sleeve onesie for Kellan's parrot costume.  I had a hat that was Aidan's when he was a baby and so I just took some of the leftover boa and glued it to that.  I had planned on putting some yellow tights on him but as my luck would have it,  it was a pretty mild night when we Trick or Treated so we were able to let him show off his legs.

For Aidan, we (he and I) brainstormed big time.  We ended up using a white polo shirt and an old pair of his jeans.  I cut the jeans below the knee and we covered them in black and brown shoe polish to make them look "dirty".  I had a wide black leather belt from probably eighth grade that I wrapped around him twice and we stuck a pirate gun in his waist.  I gave him a smokey eye and threw on his Pirates of the Carribean hat from Disney.  Added a couple of gold chains and voila! He was my little pirate! 

Adam was sad to have to work on Kellan's first Halloween but my brother "Uncle Bobby" stepped in and came with us.  Trick or treating is not easy with children.  You have sore feet, costume malfunction, wanting to stop at every house to eat all your candy, the stroller/wagon to push and a baby to juggle.  But even with all of that nonsense, it's still so much fun.  And my brother was such a big help.  We got a few good laughs out of how many people thought Kellan was a chicken.  

I'm already thinking about next year! 

Aidan's Indian Vest

Aidan had to have an Indian vest made for a pre-Thanksgiving pow wow at school.  His teachers were pretty vague about what they wanted us to do.  They suggested we use a brown paper grocery bag and sent home a sheet of paper with some Indian "signs" on it.

I had creative freedom over this one.  I honestly started to get crazy.  I was thinking about buying a piece of leather and sewing it in to a vest.  Ordering real bird feathers.  

Then I came back down to Earth at Harris Teeter one morning and picked up the paper bag.  I wanted Aidan to actually get to do it.   

Between this vest and our Thanksgiving placemat, I was loving all of our craft projects. 

Finished project...

And a snapshot from his Thanksgiving "play"...

Aidan's Asthma

Let's start at the beginning. 

{Literally} 4 years ago, when Aidan started getting seasonal colds he would wheeze for month's afterwards. 

I mentioned it to our pediatrician every time we saw her for years.  She would always brush it off and

tell me that in a few years we would test him for allergies.   I would leave feeling defeated.

Then as he got older, he was wheezing all the time and he started having a constant cough. 

Every night he would wake up with coughing fits.  It peaked in the Fall/Winter  Spring/Summer change of seasons. 

He coughs until he gets sick to his stomach.  EVERY. NIGHT.

Since starting Kindergarten in August, he has probably missed 5 days of school because he wakes up coughing, gets sick and cannot get back to sleep. 

There are a lot of things I am tough about as a mother but I cannot stand to see my child suffering and then push him out the door to school a zombie. 

Our pediatrician was not seeing a problem with that.  "Kids sometimes cough until they get sick" was all she ever said. 

So first things first, we switched pediatricians. 

And after one appointment and listening to Aidan breathe, they immediately referred us to an asthma/allergy specialist in town. 
(About twenty five minutes in the opposite direction of our house but whatever)

We were able to get in to see him 2 days later.  They knew Aidan had been suffering for years and it was time to get him some relief.

The second we met the Dr. I knew we were in the right place.  I loved that he spoke to Aidan. 

He asked Aidan to tell him how it feels when he runs/plays and when he wakes up at night coughing. 

He asked me what I observed on a daily basis and then checked with Aidan to make sure we were all on the same page.   He was attentive when I pulled out the list of questions Adam wanted me to ask him. 

He showed Aidan diagrams of his lungs and explained to him what Asthma was and why he thought he had it.

Then he laid out a dozen options we could choose from to treat Aidan.

Our Dr. looked at me and said "I want to tell you, I see so many mothers that don't have the backbone to stand up for their children and push forward to find an answer to a problem because they are afraid of a diagnosis.  Aidan's asthma is going to be a constant battle and it's a lot of work to stay on top of.  I really commend you for being brave enough to keep asking questions and getting this done.  I promise you I will get this kid healthier for you." 

And then he hugged me and I cried.   

I felt such a weight lifted off my shoulders that Aidan is going to start feeling better.  And I don't have to walk around with the guilt that he is missing school.

He prescribed us SIX prescriptions,  wrote letters to the school nurse,  drew out diagrams for treatment plans,  had the nurse schedule us a follow up for the week before Christmas and sent us on our way. 

Aidan is excited.  He knows he's going to feel better. 

That night when Adam got home from work, I cried again.  It's heartbreaking to think that Aidan may have something that limits him to certain activities or allow him to keep up with his friends during his childhood.  But more than anything, I think I finally let myself be a little bit emotional after YEARS of being tough and watching Aidan hurt without having an answer for him.  I have felt so much guilt over it all.  When he would get up in the middle of the night and cry from getting sick over and over I felt helpless that I couldn't help him.  We knew every night when he went to bed he was going to wake up at some point coughing and long after Adam and I would fall back asleep, he would be up hurting, alone.  It was so unsettling.  I'm glad I stayed on top of it.  It's going to be a battle and some work to keep up with but it's always worth it when it comes to your kids.  I'm so glad we finally have an answer!

Update: Aidan has been on his twice daily inhaler for about 6 weeks now.  His coughing almost stopped completely after just a week!  The circles under his eyes are getting better and overall I think he feels so much better! 

My handsome, sweet boy. 

 

Just a small addition to our medicine cabinet. 

Pumpkin Patch 2013

I'm laughing at how many posts I have sitting in my drafts that I have yet to publish.   Yes, the blog has been neglected.  Better late than never, right?  If I had a dollar for every time I've said that...I could pay someone else to keep our memories!

We made our annual pilgrimage to Mooresville, NC to our favorite pumpkin patch at Carrigan Farms.  I love it up there because the family that owns the farm is so nice and we know the routine there. 

I remember last year being pregnant and annoying Adam and Aidan by saying no less than 100 times..."Next year we will have the baby with us".  And this year he was.

 

Kellan slept on the ride there so he was a little bit sleepy when we first arrived.  Adam popped him in the Ergo and bundled him up until he woke up. 

 

 

 I'm constantly reminding Aidan that he is my "first baby".  I love this kid so much.  He never turns me down when I ask for a hug or a kiss. 

 

 

 Hay ride out to the patch!

 

They have a small fenced in area with all kinds of farm animals when you get up to the pumpkin patch near the pond and I'm always such a sucker for the piglets!

 

The search begins...

 

Those look good!

 And I tried to get the perfect picture of the boys on the pumpkin pile...



We let Aidan jump in the bounce houses for a half an hour or so.  It left plenty of time for Kellan to crawl around in the grass. 

 

And for more selfies.  Obviously.

 

 

 

I had to post this collage I made and posted on my Instagram.  It's 6 years of Aidan at the pumpkin patch.  Too cute! I can't wait to do one for Kellan!  

 

 



Dear Kellan on Your First Birthday

Kellan,

You are one, baby boy.  It's hard to believe a year has passed.  I can still remember the first time I held you.  They laid you right on my chest and you were so warm.  I can close my eyes and feel the warmth again.  

I felt so overwhelmed this round.  I had prayed so long for the perfect time to have you, that once you were actually here, the amount of excitement I had was almost debilitating.  

I was so thrilled and so scared.  With your brother I was a newbie, blissfully unaware of all the things that could go wrong.  I hadn't discovered the tradgedy so many mothers suffer through loosing babies until long after I had your brother. 

I hid behind such anxiety my entire pregnancy with you.  I was always terrified my next Drs appointment would bear some sort of bad news.  I didn't feel like I deserved to be so happy about you.  

Went I went in to labor with you it lasted almost two days.  I was surrounded by everyone that loves us.  But It was different than with Aidan. I was in so much pain but I knew the joy to come at the end.  This round, I was able to keep my eye on the prize and nothing was going to break that focus.  I remember being in Nana and Grandpas kitchen, everyone else in the house was asleep,  and I was bent over their countertop praying to God for some progress.  It felt like the pain was endless.  Every few minutes I would whisper...I just can't wait to meet you.  I can't wait to meet you.  The thought of holding you for the first time and feeling what I felt when I did it with Aidan, made it all worth it.  No mother ever says she wouldn't do it all over again. 

Then you were here.  And I have loved every single minute of you.   I knew I would love you but Im always shocked at how in the first second you see your child, the way the love just changes you.  

This time I'm not going to say, I can't wait to see you grow.  I know how fast that happens.  I just want to soak you in everyday.  Celebrate baby steps and not wonder so much about what your voice will sound like or what sports you will enjoy.

You were meant to be mine baby boy.  Long before Daddy and I wanted you, and Aidan begged for you...God knew you were ours.  You could not be more perfect to us all.  You bring so much more joy to our everyday.  I will never not be crazy about celebrating the day you were born.  My Kellan Adam.  

Love, Mommy

I also just want to say THANK YOU to our village that helps raise these boys with us.  Coming home from the hospital with Kellan to a house that hadn't had a baby in it for sometime was an emotional roller coaster for me.  Adam works ALOT and I felt like a single parent that couldn't get it together for weeks on end.   I'm sure some of that's normal but it never feels like it when you're in it.  

So...thank you Candace for not laughing at me when I called you and asked you questions I used to give you the answers to.

Thank you Amanda for calling me all the time and letting me cry. And for coming and holding my baby when I couldn't anymore.  And Fizz you too.  And Chelsea, you too.  

Thank You Melissa for the Booty Loop walks and listening and making me feel like you were on my Mommy team. 

Thank you Dad for calling to check on me everyday on your ride home from work. And making sure Aidan was OK.  I don't ever look forward to you finding someone else who needs taking care of.  You have saved so many days!

Thank You Mom, because at the end of the day, if I can't fix it, you always do. You really always do.  And you love my kids the best.

I appreciate you all so much and couldn't have made it through this year without you.  

Kellan Adam 11 Mos

I can't believe our munchkin is going to be a year old in just one short month.

Crazy how fast the past 11 months have flown by!

 

 

 

We saw our new pediatrician this month and finally got some updated stats on you.

Ready for this?

You are 29lbs 15.5oz and 29 inches long. 

Daddy was cracking up.  That's a lb. an inch!

100th percentile.

 

Your Dr. said to us "you never hear anyone say they love a skinny baby".  We laughed so hard.

He assured us you would thin out just like your brother did.  We are not one bit concerned.  Your a doll and I don't want you to loose your cheeks!!

 

You got a few shots and cried so hard.  You were so upset. 

Then they drew blood from your finger and put a band aid on it.  You would have thought they sawed the finger off.  You screamed bloody murder over a band aid.

You were waving your finger at Daddy like "get this OFF".

It was kind of cute.

 

You now have six teeth and are starting to eat a lot more.  We are on a restaurant hiatus because you grab at everyone's food but your own and it's impossible for anyone else to eat.   No biggie.  We cut your bottles back to 4 ounces and you are still loving your purees.  You eat whatever Aidan eats cut up really small.   You are sort of taking a sippy cup.  You don't prefer them but I think you have realized that sometimes it's either the sippy cup or you go hungry.  Life is so unfair.

 

 

Speaking of Aidan.  Your may just be OBSESSED with him.   OBSESSED.  Thank goodness for his patience and his mutual obsession with you.  I'm amazed at how much fun you two can have with such an age gap between you but you do.    Daddy and I sit back and watch you to play for hours sometimes. 

 

You sleep like a champ.  I've been lucky with good sleepers.  You got to bed between 7-7:30 and you sleep until around 9.  Once in a while you wake up at 7 and we give you a 2ounce bottle in your crib and you will sleep until 10am.  It's GLORIOUS.  You take two big naps a day.  One mid morning and one late afternoon.   You have become a full on stomach sleeper.  Every night I have to go back in to your room to cover you up because I'm worried you are freezing. 

 

We still can't go anywhere without people stopping to talk to you.  You really are the happiest baby.  And loud.  You want people to notice you.  If you catch someone's attention you start waving and smiling and talking up a storm.  People love it.  It makes Aidan so proud.  He is always sure to tell everyone "that's my baby brother and he is sooooo cute".

 

You are so much busier than Aidan ever was.  Your favorite past times are trying to stick your fingers in random outlets, raiding the pantry cabinet, tipping over the dog food/water, eating shoe laces, pulling every toy out of every toy box and not playing with a single thing and speed crawling.

I really did think you would be walking by now.  You have taken a few steps here and there but you would rather sit and crawl than stand and walk any day.  We try to hold your hands and practice but you just sit down and take off!

 





 

Let's see...what else?  You LOVE Nana and Grandpa.  You have spent two nights (the only two away from me EVER) with them and now when ever we go to their house you jump right out of my arms in to Nana's and when Grandpa scoops you up and smothers you in smooches, you laugh so hard it makes me tear up.  I love that you love them as much as Aidan does.  They are the best grandparents.

 

Our previous pediatrician had us convinced we were ruining your life because your head was a little flat in the back.  We had an evaluation for the Doc Band before the summer started and something just made me feel like we should wait.  I wanted to spend some time trying to round it out on my own before we went that route.  So for the majority of the summer I set my alarm every night and tip toed in to your room and moved your head on to the side.   Then eventually you started sleeping on your stomach and when we met with the new pediatrician a few weeks ago, he thought your head looked great!  He also said it will grow for a few more years and should be pretty close to perfect.  Good news! 

 

 

We are all so in love with you baby boy.  I was nervous wondering how the dynamic of our family would change with your addition.   You fit us so perfectly.   Your make our day, every day.  

We are so excited to celebrate your first birthday in a month with all of our family and friends!