Dear Kellan on Your First Birthday

Kellan,

You are one, baby boy.  It's hard to believe a year has passed.  I can still remember the first time I held you.  They laid you right on my chest and you were so warm.  I can close my eyes and feel the warmth again.  

I felt so overwhelmed this round.  I had prayed so long for the perfect time to have you, that once you were actually here, the amount of excitement I had was almost debilitating.  

I was so thrilled and so scared.  With your brother I was a newbie, blissfully unaware of all the things that could go wrong.  I hadn't discovered the tradgedy so many mothers suffer through loosing babies until long after I had your brother. 

I hid behind such anxiety my entire pregnancy with you.  I was always terrified my next Drs appointment would bear some sort of bad news.  I didn't feel like I deserved to be so happy about you.  

Went I went in to labor with you it lasted almost two days.  I was surrounded by everyone that loves us.  But It was different than with Aidan. I was in so much pain but I knew the joy to come at the end.  This round, I was able to keep my eye on the prize and nothing was going to break that focus.  I remember being in Nana and Grandpas kitchen, everyone else in the house was asleep,  and I was bent over their countertop praying to God for some progress.  It felt like the pain was endless.  Every few minutes I would whisper...I just can't wait to meet you.  I can't wait to meet you.  The thought of holding you for the first time and feeling what I felt when I did it with Aidan, made it all worth it.  No mother ever says she wouldn't do it all over again. 

Then you were here.  And I have loved every single minute of you.   I knew I would love you but Im always shocked at how in the first second you see your child, the way the love just changes you.  

This time I'm not going to say, I can't wait to see you grow.  I know how fast that happens.  I just want to soak you in everyday.  Celebrate baby steps and not wonder so much about what your voice will sound like or what sports you will enjoy.

You were meant to be mine baby boy.  Long before Daddy and I wanted you, and Aidan begged for you...God knew you were ours.  You could not be more perfect to us all.  You bring so much more joy to our everyday.  I will never not be crazy about celebrating the day you were born.  My Kellan Adam.  

Love, Mommy

I also just want to say THANK YOU to our village that helps raise these boys with us.  Coming home from the hospital with Kellan to a house that hadn't had a baby in it for sometime was an emotional roller coaster for me.  Adam works ALOT and I felt like a single parent that couldn't get it together for weeks on end.   I'm sure some of that's normal but it never feels like it when you're in it.  

So...thank you Candace for not laughing at me when I called you and asked you questions I used to give you the answers to.

Thank you Amanda for calling me all the time and letting me cry. And for coming and holding my baby when I couldn't anymore.  And Fizz you too.  And Chelsea, you too.  

Thank You Melissa for the Booty Loop walks and listening and making me feel like you were on my Mommy team. 

Thank you Dad for calling to check on me everyday on your ride home from work. And making sure Aidan was OK.  I don't ever look forward to you finding someone else who needs taking care of.  You have saved so many days!

Thank You Mom, because at the end of the day, if I can't fix it, you always do. You really always do.  And you love my kids the best.

I appreciate you all so much and couldn't have made it through this year without you.  

Kellan Adam 11 Mos

I can't believe our munchkin is going to be a year old in just one short month.

Crazy how fast the past 11 months have flown by!

 

 

 

We saw our new pediatrician this month and finally got some updated stats on you.

Ready for this?

You are 29lbs 15.5oz and 29 inches long. 

Daddy was cracking up.  That's a lb. an inch!

100th percentile.

 

Your Dr. said to us "you never hear anyone say they love a skinny baby".  We laughed so hard.

He assured us you would thin out just like your brother did.  We are not one bit concerned.  Your a doll and I don't want you to loose your cheeks!!

 

You got a few shots and cried so hard.  You were so upset. 

Then they drew blood from your finger and put a band aid on it.  You would have thought they sawed the finger off.  You screamed bloody murder over a band aid.

You were waving your finger at Daddy like "get this OFF".

It was kind of cute.

 

You now have six teeth and are starting to eat a lot more.  We are on a restaurant hiatus because you grab at everyone's food but your own and it's impossible for anyone else to eat.   No biggie.  We cut your bottles back to 4 ounces and you are still loving your purees.  You eat whatever Aidan eats cut up really small.   You are sort of taking a sippy cup.  You don't prefer them but I think you have realized that sometimes it's either the sippy cup or you go hungry.  Life is so unfair.

 

 

Speaking of Aidan.  Your may just be OBSESSED with him.   OBSESSED.  Thank goodness for his patience and his mutual obsession with you.  I'm amazed at how much fun you two can have with such an age gap between you but you do.    Daddy and I sit back and watch you to play for hours sometimes. 

 

You sleep like a champ.  I've been lucky with good sleepers.  You got to bed between 7-7:30 and you sleep until around 9.  Once in a while you wake up at 7 and we give you a 2ounce bottle in your crib and you will sleep until 10am.  It's GLORIOUS.  You take two big naps a day.  One mid morning and one late afternoon.   You have become a full on stomach sleeper.  Every night I have to go back in to your room to cover you up because I'm worried you are freezing. 

 

We still can't go anywhere without people stopping to talk to you.  You really are the happiest baby.  And loud.  You want people to notice you.  If you catch someone's attention you start waving and smiling and talking up a storm.  People love it.  It makes Aidan so proud.  He is always sure to tell everyone "that's my baby brother and he is sooooo cute".

 

You are so much busier than Aidan ever was.  Your favorite past times are trying to stick your fingers in random outlets, raiding the pantry cabinet, tipping over the dog food/water, eating shoe laces, pulling every toy out of every toy box and not playing with a single thing and speed crawling.

I really did think you would be walking by now.  You have taken a few steps here and there but you would rather sit and crawl than stand and walk any day.  We try to hold your hands and practice but you just sit down and take off!

 





 

Let's see...what else?  You LOVE Nana and Grandpa.  You have spent two nights (the only two away from me EVER) with them and now when ever we go to their house you jump right out of my arms in to Nana's and when Grandpa scoops you up and smothers you in smooches, you laugh so hard it makes me tear up.  I love that you love them as much as Aidan does.  They are the best grandparents.

 

Our previous pediatrician had us convinced we were ruining your life because your head was a little flat in the back.  We had an evaluation for the Doc Band before the summer started and something just made me feel like we should wait.  I wanted to spend some time trying to round it out on my own before we went that route.  So for the majority of the summer I set my alarm every night and tip toed in to your room and moved your head on to the side.   Then eventually you started sleeping on your stomach and when we met with the new pediatrician a few weeks ago, he thought your head looked great!  He also said it will grow for a few more years and should be pretty close to perfect.  Good news! 

 

 

We are all so in love with you baby boy.  I was nervous wondering how the dynamic of our family would change with your addition.   You fit us so perfectly.   Your make our day, every day.  

We are so excited to celebrate your first birthday in a month with all of our family and friends!

 

Kellan 10 Months

Our little man is just two months shy of his FIRST birthday! I cannot believe that!  I can still remember how warm he was when they put him on my chest for the first time.  I say this all the time but goodness does the time fly. 

Every month he changes a little bit more. He has been such a different baby than Aidan, it's like learning to parent a baby from the very beginning.  

He sleeps 7:30-7:30ish,gets up just to drink a bottle and goes right back down until 9:30 or 10.  Which is wonderful because it gives everyone else time to get their day going around here.  If we are headed out early on the weekends, he takes this nap in the car.  He also takes an afternoon nap if we are home.  He may snooze in the car if we miss it but if not he's OK.  If he misses that morning nap, he's off all day.  He's primarily sleeping on his belly now! 

This month he has four teeth!  He still struggling with choking but it's getting better everyday.  I have to give a lot of credit to Adam because he will feed him and help him when he chokes.   He's still primarily eating baby food out of the squeeze packs.  He loves anything having to do with fruit.   He wants nothing to do with a sippy cup.  We have tried to introduce it numerous times only to be met with a screeching baby.  

He weighs 23lbs according to my parents scale.  He is wearing 12-18 month clothing.  They were a little big on him but we didn't have anything left in 9-12 that was warm enough for the cooler weather.   Wearing a size 4 diaper. 

I thought he would be walking by now but he seems to love crawling.  And he is so fast.  He's a speed crawler for sure.  He pulls up on everything and loves to yank stuff off of tables, Aidan's desk...basically whatever he can get those little mitts on.   He stands alone without meaning to and once he notices sits down immediately.

He is still obsessed with his brother.  Everything Aidan does is hilarious.   We are so lucky Aidan has been so patient with him.  I can count on one hand how many times Aidan has been frustrated with him in the past 10 months.  They mostly just love the heck out of each other which we think is wonderful.

Kellan and Aidan stayed with my parents over night together for the first time since he was born.  It was our first night away from him.  I'm just realizing this as I am typing it! What a milestone!  And I can't believe it took us almost ten months! We went to my girlfriend Amie's wedding in town and my parents basically kidnapped them for the night.  My mom said he was perfect.  

Have I mentioned before he is not a real fan of the car.  No road trips in our near future.  He can handle an hour or so but after that its scream city.

We took the boys camping on our friends property in Waxhaw.  We had promised Aidan we would let he and his BFF camp.  I didn't realize we would all end up in the tent (I was planning on sleeping indoors) but that's not how things worked out and before I knew it,  Kellan and I were wide awake all night while the boys all sawed logs around us.  It was miserable for us both and we slept all day the next day.  

He loves people.  Everywhere we go people stop to talk to him because he is so smiley.  It's pretty cute! 

I'm hoping time slows down a little bit.   I'm trying to soak in all the baby-ness he has to offer but I have to admit its a lot harder slowing down with two kiddos.  Especially with Aidan being so active.  But I try!  I've started planning his birthday party and as badly as I would like for him to not reach that milestone, it's gonna happen.  Sooner than later.

We love you so much Kellan! 

Cute, right? 

Happy Anniversary Sweetheart

Adam,

Another anniversary post. 

We made it another year. 

Barely, but we made it baby.  : )

I thought the end of last year was a hard year for us but 2013 decided to take the cake.

This year we really had to live up to the vows we took 6 years ago. 

I can't tell you how many times I repeated "for better or worse" over and over in my head. 

And I'm sorry if there were times I let you down or didn't focus enough on us. 

We've both made mistakes and this marriage is not perfect.  

But I learned so much this year. 

Forgiveness is a wonderful thing. 

Your happiness and our family is my top priority. 

We are a team. 

We hurt together, laugh together, love together. 

And together is the only place I've ever wanted to be. 

Thanks for sticking it out everyday with me.

This is going to be one hell of  a love story.

I love you so much.

April

 



Decorating for Fall- Wreath Tutorial-Sort Of

Every Fall I try to make a wreath.  I don't always aim to keep it inexpensive and relatively simple but this year I felt a little out of practice.  So this way if I hated it, I didn't break the bank and it was good practice for better wreaths in the future.  

I had seen some tutorials on burlap ribbon wreaths on Pinterest that seemed easy enough. 

I took the boys to Hobby Lobby to get supplies.  I let Aidan pick out the ribbon colors.  He picked Panther colors so it had doubled as a Fall and Panthers wreath.  I've been looking for a Carolina Panthers "broach" of sorts to add to it for next season.  

This is what you need:

A wire wreath form

Floral wire

Burlap ribbon in your color of choice

A contrasting burlap ribbon for your bow if you want one

And a wood initial if you want to add one 

This is how easy this was.  All you have to do is loop the burlap ribbon loosely around the wreath form while creating billowy loops and secure them with floral wire every 3 inches or so. 

Tie a bow with your contrasting fabric and secure it with the floral wire. 

If you are adding a monogram letter, to make it look like it's floating I used white sewing thread and tied it on. 

Voila...Fall Wreath.  Less than $15.  

 

Now that I know I still have it in me, things may get a crazier at Christmas time.

image via

 

 

 

 

If you make one, post a link in my comments...would love to see it! 

A Little De-Cluttering

The thing about living in such a tiny house is, any bit of clutter is too much.

Our kitchen was an area of our house we felt was over flowing with JUNK!  I was honestly dreading having to get on a stool and clean out our cabinets but it had to be done!  

Well I lucked out and Adam (this is not the lucky part) had an asthma attack one night and couldn't sleep so he knocked the project out for me! I woke up the next day and was thrilled!  And Adam was so proud of himself! 

I didn't take before photos but trust, this was a project.  We are talking 7 years of too many baby items, random water bottles, expired baking supplies etc.  

This 31 days is turning in to a family affair and I kinda love it. 

The County Fair

Nothing kicks off the cool weather season like a trip to the County Fair.  We don't actually have a fair in our county BUT we travel a short distance to Cleveland County every year to visit their fair. It's become a tradition and we love it. 

It was so much fun seeing Kellan get to experience it for the first time.  He was so in to all the lights and loved watching his big brother ride everything.  He even took his first fair ride with Adam and Aidan on a mini helicopter that I could walk faster than.  Regardless, they all got the biggest kick out of it! 

 

We really did have so much fun!  We got to see some of Adam's old friends from high school and their families and eat lots of fair food!  I'm already looking forward to next year!